Introduction to The Anthology of Seasons

2012-01-28T05:11:00.000-08:00

INTRODUCTION

I don't know why I decided to do this. This is my life's work,after all. Oh well, we all start small. Let's get to the point: this blog isall about my poetry. Ok, I know it may sound like small potatoes to you, andmaybe it is, but it's big stuff to me. Actually.... this blog (all right, blogs) consists of only 10% of all theworks I've written in verse form in my entire life. The other 90% are simplytoo sensitive for public eyes to see. Let's keep it at that, shall we?

I started writing back in December 1998. I don't exactly know what on earthpossessed me to buy that black A'Zone notebook with silver trim (which looksreally neat, by the way), pick up a pen and start writing in verse. I guessit's because..... lots of people make fun of my voice without really listeningto what I have to say. For some reason my pseudo-Brit accent (Irish maybe?)have people up in stitches and somehow possess them to make fun of my voice.Why, I once worked at a 7-Eleven before I donned camouflage uniform to servethe country. Three 14-year old girls from a nearby girls'school (which I shall not name) poked fun of my voice and imitated it whenI told them how much they owed.

…………….

Ok....pretty long detour there. So anyway, I decided that the only way for my truevoice to be heard was through written script. For some reason, I chose to writein verse instead of continuous prose.

Thereinlies the irony. While I chose to make my voice heard through written verse,this meant that few people would hear it. After all, some of the pieces I wroteare a little too... volatile to be made known to the world. Some of themwould cause quite a bit of a scandal, to say the least.

I named the first book The Thin Black Book. Well, it's a littleunimaginative (give me a break.... I was just fifteen at the time), butsomewhat full of meaning. Black is the colour of secrecy, and I've gotlots of secrets uncovered in the book. You can start to unravel what goes on inmy mind just by reading it (which of course, you can't). Though I can't typeout everything out of practical and privacy issues, I can give some excerpts,which I shall provide in due course.

I eventually produced a total of 30 poems and 8 songs. I'm musicallyilliterate, so my songwriting is, for all purposes and intentions, lyricwriting. I thought my days as a poet would end there, but I was wrong. I wenton to make a sequel: The Book of Flying Colours. I'll explain more in duecourse.

Eventually I decided that I was going to make a whole series of books. I neededa title for the series. At first I came up with The Dead Poet's Epic, but nixedit as it was too ostentatious and somewhat copyright-infringing. The name TheBooks of Seasons was then floated, but I decided that was a bit too simplisticand immature.

Then, one day I saw an advertisement for The Beatles' Anthology Album. Ifinally came up with a name worthy of the series based on that ad. Henceforththe series was known as:

The Anthology of Seasons.

Laterstill after I had written several books I decided it would be better to splitthe Anthology into several sections. For lack of a better word, I called thesesections Parts. Each Part more or less covers a defining era in my life: UpperSecondary, Junior College years, and National Service Full-Time. Each Part consistsof three books and are named as such:

Part I: Fifteen Minutes ofFame (Upper Secondary)

Part II: The Days of FuturePast (Junior College Years)

Part III: Driven (NationalService Full-Time)

Part IV: Ad Astra Per Aspera (TheUniversity Years)

Onward tothe poems, then. I'm sure I've bored you enough with the structure. It's veryimportant, though. I'll elaborate more.

STRUCTURE OF THE ANTHOLOGY

Part I: Fifteen Minutes of Fame (December1998 – January 2000)

Andy Warhol once said that in the near future, each and every one of usis going to get his or her fifteen minutes of fame. Now, I wrote this Part fromDecember 1998 to January 2000. Basically, I wrote most of it in 1999.Now, 1999 was my fifteen minutes of fame. I achieved so much in solittle time. I don't want to sound as though I'm bragging, but that'swhat that exactly happened. I did really well in my studies, lots ofpeople began to see past my accent and accept me for who I am, yada-yada,so on and so forth. Sec 4I, if you're reading this, perhaps you know what I'mtalking about.

Book I: The Thin BlackBook (December 1998 – April 1999)

I alreadywrote about this in the Introduction, so i won't bore you further.

Book II: The Book ofFlying Colours (April 1999 – September 1999)

I wrotethis book in mid-1999. As I had said earlier, 1999 was my fifteen minutes offame. I also felt that I was passing the test of life with flying colours.That's how I got the inspiration to name the book as such.

Book III: The LittleBook of Reflections (September 1999 – January 2000)

I startedto mellow out as time passed. I thought a lot about what I've done in my lifeso far, where I've been and the people I've met, and so I decided to reflect onwhat's been going on in my life so far in this book. When I look into a mirror,I'm not sure exactly what is being reflected back at me - my true self orsomething I want to see? This book deals a lot with both issues.

Part II: The Days of Future Past (January2000 – January 2002)

I'lladmit it: I ripped off the title for this Part from a saga in Marvel Comics'The Uncanny X-Men. The plots for the saga are pretty complicated, and sufficeto say it involves travelling to the past to prevent a terrible future fromhappening.

I guess that'swhere the apparently grammatically-challenged title comes from. Instead oftalking fondly about the days of times past, we end up talking about thedays of a future which is already past. In these books I visualise how it wouldfeel like if my future counterpart were to go back into the present timeto prevent terrible things in his time. That's one of the reasons why we shouldmake most of the present and learn before it's too late...

Book IV: The Book ofSeasons Past (January 2000 – August 2000)

The titleof this book uses more or less the same imagery behind the title of the Part.It deals a lot with my past, which wasn't exactly the proverbial bed of rosesas some might imagine. Let's just say that it's not something I really want toput on this blog. If you're lucky enough, I'll tell you more about it sometime.I'm sure you'll get a kick out of it.

Book V: The Book ofthe Open Road (August 2000 – May 2001)

When Istarted writing this book, I was feeling somewhat blue. Not THAT kind of blue.I was feeling rather down. Sometimes I'm not too sure exactly what it is I'mfighting for and felt kind of... lost.

I decidedthat I had an open road in front of me. One that is fraught with danger, terrorand God knows what. The path could also be full of joy and happinessif that was what I really wanted. I realised that while we can neverbe sure what we may encounter as we walk the path, that's not much of a reasonto refrain from doing so. We should just make the best of whatever that is thrownat us.

Book VI: Shadows of aTime Remembered (May 2001 – January 2002)

When Igot around to writing this book, I grew sick and tired of the repetitivesounding 'The Book of.... '. I decided to discard the usual way ofnaming the books. In addition to sounding less boring, this gave me more leewayas to what the books should be named.

Now, as Isaid earlier, I've got my own personal demons from my past. I know everyone'sgot their own demons, but mine still hound me every now and then.There's always the shadow of a past I always want to forget falling on me.

Part III: Driven (January 2002 – April 2004)

I was being driven by hope through the worst of my days. It was the only thing whichprevented me from giving up in the face of difficult odds, and kept me fromgoing insane.

More to the point, there was someone. I'm the only one who knows for sure who she is. She herself doesn't know her own part in the Anthology; it wasn't unrequited love as much as it was a yearning for someone whom you know you could never have.

However, I find myself continually wondering whether it's worth it tocarry on fighting for the sake of someone else. I know fighting for the sake oflove is a noble cause, but it doesn't feel right that I'm not fighting formyself. Especially after I graduated from school and joined the army and sheleft the picture. I think I lost a lot of my drive after that. I was driven bymy love for someone else, and now, I'm not so sure what I should be drivenby.....

In addition, I felt that the title had a very raw and brutal feel to itwhich correctly exemplifies the harshness and audacity of my NationalService Years.

Book VII: The Wheel ofPossibilities (January 2002 – November 2002)

I wasinspired to name this book as such after listening to several lines of the song'Out of My Head' by Fastball. It goes as follows:

Sometimes I feel
That I am drunk behind the wheel
The wheel of possibility
However it may roll

I feltthat the above lines described my current situation perfectly. I find myselfhard-pressed to explain what it is that's been my driving force thesedays. I also sometimes make choices and decisions which do not alwaysturn out right. You can say that I was drunk while making some of mydecisions. Not in the physical sense of the word, anyway.

In addition, the third line fits in perfectly with the driving imagery I usedin the title of this Part.

Book VIII: The Storyof Hope (November 2002 – September 2003)

I startedwriting this book just as I joined an infantry battalion as a front-line medic.It was terrible, to say the least. The only thing that kept my spirits up was hope.Hope for the future. Hope for better times.

The Anthology proved to be an excellent outlet for whatever anguish and miseryI felt. However, The Anthology is not the story of misery. It is the story ofhope.

Book IX: As TearsSubside (September 2003 – April 2004)

If youread the introduction to Book VI, you would have known that at that point intime I was in a state of perpetual frustration and rage which threatened toovercome me. Eventually I calmed down some, but I'm rather ashamed to say that asmall part of it lingered within me for some time.

As time passed, however, after going through more than a year of army life Ifound myself questioning the wisdom of allowing sadness and simmering rage intomy soul. It doesn't make sense to shed tears of sadness and rage all the time.Sooner or later, you're going to have to carry on with life.

And that was precisely what I did. There's no point in hating anyone who mayhave wronged me in any way. Hatred only keeps the wounds open, doesn't it?Wouldn't it be better to just let it be? Let those who wish ill of me findtheir own way. I am on the path. I shall never let anyone who strays from thepath to lead me astray as well.

Henceforth there will neither be tears of sadness, nor tears of rage….. Hopefully.

Part IV: Ad Astra Per Aspera (April 2004- )

As all ofyou can see, Ad Astra Per Aspera is a work-in progress. It was meant to coverthe first few years of my undergraduate life at the National University ofSingapore (NUS).

Ad AstraPer Aspera represents a departure from the other Parts in many ways. For one,the title of this part itself is a Latin phrase. To the uninitiated, it roughlymeans, “A Rocky Road Leads to The Stars”. Simple, yet profound, isn’t it? Theirony of the title is that I ripped it off from a scene in the no-brainer movie‘Armageddon’ (1998).

Anyway,the title is self-explanatory, so I won’t go into much detail here. A journeyfull of strife and difficulties can eventually only leads to greatness andglory. As much as we do not always want to have to face difficulties in thisjourney that we call life, it is only through these difficulties that we get tosee just how strong and resilient we can be. This Part marks my departure fromteenage life and into adulthood.

Unfortunately,I lost the will to go on writing poetry after several years of doing all thiswork. And that was exactly happened: it turned into work. Far from being ameans of releasing all my pent-up thoughts and opinions, it turned into a chorethat I had to do because I promised myself to do it. And eventually even thatpromise turned out to be one that was meant to be broken.

Book X:The Return to Innocence (April 2004 - December 2004)

After 2 ½years of positively slogging through an infantry battalion as a front-linemedic, I’ve had many experiences which have shaped me in many ways. At the sametime, some of those experiences have also shaped me in ways which I would neveraccept, for better or worse. I lost most of my sense of innocence and precociousnesswhen I was the Army. Don’t laugh, people…. Those 2 ½ years roughened me upworse (in some ways) than the difficulties of my teenage life.

Now,after all this while, I have survived.

Now, Ican return to my innocence….. and my peace.

Book XI:Snow Does Fall On Africa (December 2004 - )

Theinspiration behind this title comes from a certain verse in the famous song 'DoThey Know It's Christmas?' by Band-Aid:

And there won't be snow in Africa this Christmas time
The greatest gift they'll get this year is life

So youcould say that the title to Book XI is my response to that particular verse. It(that verse) paints a particularly bleak picture of the plight of manyimpoverished people in the world (particularly, Africa). With the proposed titleI plan to make a statement about my belief that no matter how bleak or terribleyour situation may be in, there is always a ray of light..... a shred ofhope.... only if you believe. Hope does exist for everyone everywhere.... ifonly they believe in love... and the human spirit.

I'm still feeling somewhat dubious about the title, though. I don'tknow.... it just seems a bit.... lightweight. After all, the song itself issomewhat... dubious. I know it's for a good cause, but it some parts of it seemrather patronising. I mean, it's not as if the whole of Africa is one dry,starving and desolate wasteland where 'nothing ever grows' and 'no rainnor rivers flow', right? The tune's excellent, though, and as I had pointed outearlier, it is indeed for a good cause.

That said, it was at this point that I finally threw in the toweland gave up on the Anthology sometime in 2006. The Web of Fudge instead cameinto prominence as I started to write in continuous prose instead of verse. Ihad always regretted giving up on the Anthology, though, and after six years ofneglecting it I decided that it was time to go back to it and rediscovermyself.

The Anthology, after all, more than just took up a good part of mylife. Rather, it was pretty much my whole life. I always felt that the Anthologywas a means of understanding who I was, who I am, and who I would turn out tobe. Now that I’ve taken to reading the entire Anthology again from the verybeginning…. I realize I am a very different person from who I used to be. Thatkid who started out writing the Anthology back in late 1998 was pretty much theexact reverse of what I am now.

And now, I shall showcase to you part of the Anthology. I don’tsee it as a quest for me to promote myself (if anything, my poetic licenceought to be revoked for such poor poetry), but rather, as a means for me torediscover myself as much as it is for all of you to discover who I am.

CLICK ON THE LINKS AT THE SIDE TO ACCESS THE DIFFERENT BOOKS OFTHE ANTHOLOGY.